I guess I don't write much because there's not much to talk about. I have become the most boring person on the planet. Who knew that was coming.
My love and I have survived 6 months and totally forgot to commemorate the occasion. He's registered to go back to school and has been training for a new job, which he's not sure he's going to keep. Was a bomb text message, so I don't know exactly why he has suddenly decided it's not worth the effort. I had an interview yesterday that got rescheduled to two weeks from now. It's a fairly big job, I guess. I was really excited until right before bed last night, I got a case of nausea and started vomiting up all my dinner. Third time I've done that in almost 2 weeks...and as far as I know I am not pregnant. I'm 99.9% sure I am not. Always leave room for that slight possibility.
All this drama with my digestive system has me really starting to feel an aversion to food. I prolong eating as long as I can in the morning, until hypoglycemia kicks in and I start to get lightheaded and feeling pukey. I'm blaming last night on the ice cream I ate. Nevermind the fact I ate it two nights ago and was perfectly fine. Denial is a luxury sometimes.
My love spent the day yesterday reminding me how he fell in love with me and how much he missed us working together. I've been on his case about showing me how he feels because this distance thing is such a major bitch; 50% of the time I'm in real fear we're going to break up. 50% of the time I feel like he forgets I'm here. I talked to a friend and he assured me that was likely my own demon and caused by our separation at the moment. I accept that, but it still makes it difficult to remind myself it's just me and to stop being such a drama queen. I mean, this guy bought me a diamond ring when I quit my job and was moving. He spent half his paycheck on a gorgeous reminder he was in it and he loved me...then, we fell out of good mornings/good nights and saying I love yous. We have mended that aspect and both of us put forth more effort, and that has helped a million times over. Yet, there's this nagging feeling that something isn't right. If it helps, I generally feel that way about everything so it's probably just me.
It feels like winter here in the Atl today. It's cold and gloomy, so I spent my morning in the bathtub soaking up the heat and forgetting life even exists.
