So I deleted some of my writings. Maybe I will regret that in the future, but I feel with the lowly depressing content, it was something that needed to be done. I spent some time reading an old journal I used to keep ten years ago, and there was so much I forgot.
Pages and pages of my life I would not have remembered without the words left in legacy. Almost 2 solid years of what I did while doing methamphetamine and suffering the loss of a lover, followed by so many sexual adventures and all my friends. God, I was so social I barely recognize myself in there. The partying I did in 2007, after dropping the meth and old friends. Falling in love again. It was so beautiful to reconnect with everything I forgot.
My life is nothing like that anymore, which is good and sad at the same time. I used go have so much fun, but it came with a price.
Nothing much has occurred in my life as of late. Had a pregnancy scare due to condom breakage that drove my love and me crazy for a few weeks. Not pregnant, thankfully. I'm so not prepared to have children right now, and I am not okay with destroying something he and I created. So, luck stayed on my side in that one. That's honestly about the most excitement I have today.
Still no job, no prospects. I'm starting to feel like a worthless loser. This is hard.
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